Startling Truths

 1. Sex addiction is not about sex!  I guess the more appropriate way to say this is to say that it is not primarily about sex.
 2. Sex addiction is not about orgasm.  After an orgasm, men have a much lower interest in sex. 
 3. Sex addiction is about generating one’s own neurochemistry.  When sex addicts begin even to consider acting out, various neurotransmitters (chemicals) are released that produce a “high” not unlike the euphoria that drug addicts experience when they take their drug of choice. 

Sex addicts, in effect, carry their drug with them and are able to “get a hit” whenever they want it, even if they confine their acting out to fantasy only.  The release of these chemicals resulting from any compulsive sexual behavior is so addictive that some people become addicted to sexual behaviors that they must continue to repeat in order to get their next high.

In other words sex addicts are drug addicts.  They are able to initiate their own neurochemical response.  As the hunt or cruising begins, the pulse quickens, the palms sweat, the pupils dilate.   This is often referred to as being “in the bubble” or in a trance.  For the male sex addict, there may not be an erection for a long while.  Perhaps for several hours.  But he is still getting his high from a release of various neurotransmitters including GABA, glutamate, opioid peptides, dopamine, and serotonin.